Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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