we're blogging at a bar
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
