just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
