she takes plan B like it's going out of style
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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