I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
