i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
