i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
i just google imaged poop.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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