I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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