i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
