She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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