living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
