and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Rumble strips road head = magical
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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