she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
