So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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