I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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