I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
