haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
We are two peas in an std pod
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Randomize
