there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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