so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
