I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
well you can't waste a boner
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Randomize
