"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
