Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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