are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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