I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
No I am not eating basil off your cock
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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