I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
