remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
