My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
