I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
