I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
