i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize