You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
