I heard we made out
you would pick up someone in the library
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I party with great urgency now.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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