I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
