He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
