I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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