He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
