erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
