Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
