I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
