Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
i think i have two assholes
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
