Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
She needs sedatives and a leash
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
