I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
