Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
