i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just pee around me
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
