I just made out with a guy for $7.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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