i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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