I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
