Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
