If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
