I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
